“I could die today.”

I was told today about a woman who has cancer, and how she’s reacting to it. I was also told that she’s very critical, judgmental, and controlling. I said that in that case, the disease may turn out to be a blessing.

People who are told that they have a terminal disease become obsessed with finding out any and all treatments, medications, and interventions that might help them live longer, or heal them of the disease altogether. This is only natural, and good. Scores of people have had their lives improved and even saved, by doing this.

And then there are those people whose efforts fail to stop the disease. If they are wise, they surrender into the act of dying.

When this happens another kind of healing takes place. Because the ending is now clear, all hurry and rushing around cease. After all, where are they rushing to? The outcome is death, and there’s no getting around it. Why rush to get there?

When we no longer have a “future,” fear and desperation eventually dissolve. We realize that all of our efforts to control everything and everyone is futile. That doesn’t mean that we become lazy or depressed. We become aware of what is truly valuable and worth our time and effort. This is ultimately the purpose of any terminal illness from a spiritual point of view.

I’d like to suggest an exercise to you. Whatever you do today, especially when it comes to the simplest acts, say to yourself, “I could die today.”

What if this is true?

What if you were to die today?

What feelings come up when you say this?

What people come to mind?

What dreams do you regret not accomplishing?

What responsibilities do you let go of?

Next week, pick another activity to say this to yourself while you’re doing it. Pick another one the week after that.

When we bring this consciousness into our daily lives we become more gentle – with ourselves and others. We become more aware of what is really important, useful and necessary in both our actions and attitudes. We become more focused and the speed with which things happen can take our breath away.

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“If I had ten more years…”

Not everyone who comes to see me for a Medium discernment wants to reconnect with someone they lost on the Other Side. Some people want to know what to expect when they get there. They want to know who, if anyone, would be there to greet him when their soul leaves this plane. They want to know what their life in the next level will be like. They want to talk about what this life was like.

Paul had bone cancer. His time to go was soon and he knew it.  He didn’t want to die, and he didn’t want to let go of those he loved here.

“I wish I had 10 more years to live,” he said.

“What would you do if you did?”

“I’d be more kind,” he sighed.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

http://www.anthonyquinata.com

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Sarah’s healing starts with an apology from the Other Side

I worked at a psychic fair this past Saturday and in between readings an astrologer named Sarah came up to me. “I have a question to ask you,” she said. “I was told recently that my father-in-law is still with me and I was wondering if it’s true.”

I did a quick check and told her, no, it wasn’t true. In fact, I told her, he was keeping his distance out of respect for her. The following is a condensed version of what happened next.

“He’s telling me that you two didn’t get along. Is that true?”

“Yeah,” Sarah said, nodding.

“He’s telling me he wasn’t easy to get along with. Anyway, he wants me to pass a message on to you. He says, ‘I’m sorry.'”

“Oh, now you’re going to make me cry!” Sarah said. I could see tears in her eyes. I don’t mean to make anyone cry, but I kept on, passing on the messages I was getting.

“He’s telling me you helped take care of him for a long time … and I mean a long time.”

“20 years. He had ‘Aspergers.’ It’s a form of autism.”

“Did you feed him? He’s showing me you had to feed him.”

“Yes, I did. And I changed his diapers too!”

“Well, he didn’t show me that, thank God! But he is telling me that he felt entitled to all of the care you gave him. He’s saying he’s had a change of heart since his ‘life review,’ and now he’s grateful for all that you’ve done for him. And he keeps saying that he’s sorry. He hopes you’ll forgive him.”

“I can do that,” Sarah said sniffling.

“Please pray for him too.”

Sarah nodded. “All I wanted to know was that he wasn’t with me. I wasn’t expecting an apology. I didn’t think that people had a change of heart once they crossed over.”

“I call the life review ‘the answers to all of life’s questions.’ After his review he saw he was wrong and he’s asking for your forgiveness. I realize that after 20 years that may not be the easiest thing to do, but it’s the best thing you can do. For his journey on the Other Side, and for yours, in this life.”

Sarah nodded and walked away. Later, as she left the fair she walked up to me and gave me a hug – something she had never done before in all of the years I’ve known her. Apparently she really did experience some healing after all.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

http://www.anthonyquinata.com

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“Even after all these years…”

Even after all these years, the Sun never says to the Earth, “You owe me.”

Hafiz

A friend of mine came by the house yesterday and we talked for a while when she asked me to help her with an issue she was struggling with. She didn’t tell me what the issue was, and I didn’t want her to. I asked her if I could hold one of her rings, which she handed to me.

I picked up a “heated discussion” that took place between her and another female. She said that she did get into an argument with another woman that didn’t go well. “I didn’t come from a place of love,” she told me. She tried to, but when the other woman didn’t see things her way, let’s just say the “discussion” went downhill from there. Interestingly, the argument started over an act of generosity three months before.

She asked me for my thoughts as to how she should handle what happened between them. When I asked her what she wanted from this situation she admitted she wanted to be “right.” A lot of people who see me for readings are wanting to be “right.” I often ask them the question from A Course In Miracles – “Would you rather be right, or would you rather be at peace?”

Typically people will say, “Well, I’d rather be at peace.” A quick read of their heart tells me that they’ll be at peace when the asshole my client’s arguing with admits they’re right!

I’d like to suggest something different. Whatever it is you want for yourself, want it for the other person even more.

You want to be “right?” Want them to be “right” even more.

You want to “win” an argument? Want them to “win” the argument even more.

You want to be loved? Love people more than you want them to love you.  I could go on, but you get the idea.

What do you think would have happened if my friend would have done this? What if she wanted the other woman to be right more than she needed to be right?

By doing this, you step out of your ego’s illusions, and you might just see where the person you’re arguing with is coming from. You might just find out that what you’re fighting for really isn’t worth fighting about.

Am I suggesting that you be a “doormat?” Not at all. Which is why I asked my friend if she gardens. She told me she did. “Do you ever find weeds in your garden?” I asked her.

“Yes.”

“What do you do?”

“I pull them out.”

“Do you hate weeds because they’re weeds? Or do you understand they’re doing what they do because that’s just what they do?”

Weed your garden of all the people who don’t belong in your life. But before you do, keep in mind that they are a reflection of you and may just be in your life to help you learn lessons of love. That’s why you whatever you want for yourself you want it for them even more. When you do, you’re truly coming from a place of love.

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“Morning” and “Afternoon” Spiritual Journeys

Whenever I’m doing a group (less than 500 people) session, or a seminar (more than 1,000 people), if I take the time to pay attention to the initial way people are applauding, it tells me a lot about them individually. Typically, I’ll take about 45 minutes talking about being a psychic, the after-life, and after-death communication. People who initially applaud enthusiastically, even wildly, will hang on to and accept every word I’m saying. People are applauding “warmly” are letting me know that they’re open, but not real sure about me, or what I have to say. People who aren’t applauding at all were usually brought there by someone else (typically, these are men dragged there by their wives or girlfriends).

I’ve been thinking a lot about this over the last week because of the clients I did readings for and what came out of them.

In my private practice, I don’t like people to tell me anything about themselves, other than their name. The reason  for this is because I do what I call a “book flap” reading which usually lasts anywhere from 10 to 15 minutes. During that time I take a look at what’s going on in their lives, I bring up what I’m getting and we discuss it. The concerns my clients have tell me a lot about where they are in their spiritual journey.

It hit me yesterday that there’s almost a “Before” and “After” period in people’s lives. In this “before” period, people are typically living their lives from their fears, not their truth.

For men in the “before” period, they’re mostly concerned about –

1. Wealth
2. Adventure
3. Achievement
4. Pleasure
5. Being respected

For women, they’re mostly concerned, about –

1. Family
2. Independence
3. Career
4. Fitting in
5. Appearance

If they’re in what I’m referring to as the “After” period of their lives, where their priorities shift and they’re living their lives with a sense of “mission” and less from fear. Men are more concerned about  –

1. Spirituality
2. Personal peace
3. Family
4. God’s will
5. Honesty

For women, their concerns center around –

1. Their own personal growth
2. A sense of self esteem
3. Spirituality
4. Happiness
5. Forgiveness

Where are you in the journey? Just something to think about.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

http://www.anthonyquinata.com

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Starting Over

I have to admit, I can be my own worst enemy. Why? Because I can be so damned impatient, and indecisive. Plus, I don’t really own and love the place I’m starting from.

I want to be one of the country’s most sought after psychics and spiritual teachers, but I’m not. If I’m honest, there’s an anger at myself at all the time I’ve “wasted.”

I’ve decided that today is a brand new starting point in my life. Starting today I’m going to use what I’ve got and learn from what has worked for me – but most importantly – I’m not going to see yourself through a version of me that is not there “yet.” Instead, I’m going to see myself now – in the moment – and embrace the world with the knowledge of my real power.

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“Thank you for letting me know in advance…”

I sent Kathie a note telling her I posted the “Out of Darkness” information here. I received this e-mail back this morning –

I don’t know if you have talked to Josie [Varga] lately. I remember when you did my reading you said to watch my heart. I thought you were talking about  the high blood pressure.

I am now scheduled to have surgery to correct my heart rate as it has gone as high as 180 in the ER. I went in because it was 160. I have SVT [Supraventricular tachcardia (rapid heart beat)] and this is why they going to go in and correct the heart rate.

Thanks for letting me know in advance that this was going to happen so it was not a shock to me. Thank you and my angel Chrissie.

Hugs,

Blessings,

Kathie

Dear Kathie,

You are in my prayers.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

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Out of Darkness Walk for suicide prevention

Dear Friend

I will be joining with thousands of people nationwide this fall to walk in AFSP’s 2009 Out of the Darkness Community Walk to benefit the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. I would appreciate any support that you give me for this worthwhile cause.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention is at the forefront of research education and prevention initiatives designed to reduce loss of life from suicide. With more than 32000 lives lost each year in the U.S. And over one million worldwide the importance of AFSP’s mission has never been greater nor our work more urgent.

I hope you will consider supporting my participation in this event. Any contribution will help the work of AFSPand all donations are 100% tax deductible.

Donating online is safe and easy! To make an online donation please click the “Support This Participant” button on this page.

Thank you for visiting my fundraising page!
 Your fundraising page link: page link: https://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.participant&eventID=831&participantID=46131

I am walking in memory of my angel Chrissie and in memory of angel Mel and Justine.

Thanks

Kathie             

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“I’ve learned many things…” A mother shares her story about her journey through grief.

After I published the last post I was eating dinner when I received a call from my friend Jennifer. I talked about her in a previous post, along with her husband Mike. They’re good friends who have helped, and supported me on this journey.

Jennifer told me that the 24 year old son of friends of theirs was a victim of suicide this past Saturday. It broke my heart to hear the news even though I didn’t know him, or his family. Suicide is a tragedy period. I’ll write something about suicide in a day or so, but for now, I want to honor parents who have lost a child, no matter how old that child is.

I have a child who died many years ago. I think losing a child is the worst pain anyone can experience. So I decided to post this letter tonight.

A couple of years ago I was honored to be asked by Medium, and bereaved mom, Natalie Blakeslee-Smith to join her doing readings on-line for her group of bereaved parents. One of the parents was Rosaleen Bellamy. During the session I reconnected Rosaleen with her daughter Denise.

What follows is Rosaleen’s story about that event. You can find Natalie @ http://www.loveandlight.com/.

I’ve Learned Many Things…

When my only daughter Denise was born the doctor let an intern deliver her.  When they brought her to me her was so black and blue I started to cry.  I was told that this happens sometimes and she would be fine.  But I knew in my heart that I would not have her for very long and something said to me, “Enjoy her because she won’t be with you for long.” This feeling stayed with me all the time and haunted me.  So I held on to every moment I had with her. Denise was born July 14th., 1978 and died December 28th., 1984.  She was 6 -1/2 yrs. young when she crossed over from a brain tumor.

For a year Denise had violent headaches and was vomiting and lost a pile of weight.  I took Denise to our family doctor, and he said there was nothing wrong with her.  When I suggested a brain tumor, the doctor laughed in my face and said I was an overprotective mother.  This bothered me to no end so I took Denise to my old  doctor and he knew right away; he said to me, “I am sorry Rosaleen, you have a very sick little girl here.” I knew then she would not live and my heart just sank.

When they operated the brain surgeon could only get 1/3 of the tumor and the cancer spread throughout her little body. The doctor told my hubby and me that he could save her BUT she would be in a wheelchair and not likely know us and be in the vegetable state… well, we just couldn’t let this happen to our beautiful little girl.  She suffered a great deal as they were always doing something to her to keep her going as long as they could.  I was told Denise lived as long as she did because I wasn’t ready to let her go.

Now after 23 yrs. I still miss my Angel with every breath I take and I always will.  I have learned many things during her illness and since Denise crossed over.., one big one is don’t take “no” for an answer.  If you want health care professionals, etc…, to hear you, make sure you don’t give up… talk loud and long.  I’ve also learned to reach out and get help for everything I needed help with.

I needed help with the depression, grief and the many, many stages and changes I went through.  I had one lady who was a psychologist and she helped me through so much.

I am not saying it is easy by any means but you can make it… I have. It takes time and patience. Don’t try to do it by yourself when there is so much help out there.  Don’t try to do it by yourself when there is so much help out there.  It is not being weak to seek out help and don’t let anyone let you think it is.   It isn’t…..we can’t be strong all the time…life takes its toll on us.  Accept each step as it comes if you can… with help you will….I did.  It was a tough haul but it can, and does, get a little easier to bear when you have people who care.

If there is anything you wish to do in a special way for your child then do it…..if it helps you … do it.  I, and many other moms and dads have made little stands up with pictures and candles, and whatever helps us to stay connected with our children.  My little memorial is quite lovely and I made a small pond area and named it “Denise’s pond”.  Doing things like this truly helped me.

Talking with others who understand what you’re going through is important also… you need love and understanding.  We all do when we are grieving for our children.  Group support is something I didn’t have and wish I did, especially internet support groups, since we didn’t have them back that long ago.  Joining a bereavement group is very good idea but you’ll need find one that is best for you.

I am on a terrific grief group calling Healing Hearts Haven. This is where I met Anthony.  I had heard that he was very good at what he does but I did not know him and had never even heard of him until then. Natalie the moderator had a Chat session and invited Anthony.  I remember being 10-15 minutes late, I was busy and forgot actually.  So on I went to the chat and Anthony was talking to everyone and before I said anything I called to my daughter Denise… ‘Please honey, come see Mommy tonight’  for I had never been read on the chats before.

All of a sudden I had the most peaceful feeling come over me and I knew Denise was right beside me… what an awesome feeling.  Then [suddenly]  Anthony said… I have about a 4 year old little girl here…..I started crying and couldn’t answer him…..Natalie and one of the other girls said… “that is Denise … Rosaleen’s daughter”… then I came to.  I said, “yes that is my daughter Denise.”

Well the reading was fantastic!!!  He told me things no one would have known really … not him for sure … I was stunned.  One thing he told me was … “your daughter loves the Angel you put on the tree for her this year.”  How could he know?? Every year I buy an Angel for the tree…..I get Denise to let me know which one every year.

He mentioned the memorial I have set up for Denise and “Denise loves this also,” he said.  He told me things about my Dad that no one knew!   He made me feel so much better and knowing my Mom and Dad are with my daughter, it made me feel so very happy!!

Anthony also told me Denise had a long term illness then told me it was cancer.  And told me she had suffered a great deal which she had.  I cried all the way through this reading…..for many reasons but the main one was…. Anthony was right on with everything he said!

I thank you again Anthony for the gift you have and that you shared with us that night.  I so appreciate what you have done for me.  God Bless you my friend for all the comfort you give to others.

Love and light,

Rosaleen Bellamy.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

https://www.anthonyquinata.com

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Life isn’t supposed to hurt!

I love to tell stories to illustrate what I’m trying to get across. I’ve been stopped by people at a bookstore or airport who tell me that they’ve been to an event  I was at, and will then tell me their favorite story.

I’d like to tell you one now about a tailor I went to see in New York City. I wanted a suit and he came highly recommended. I picked out the fabric I wanted, was measured, and told to come back in two weeks; the suit would be ready then.

When I came back and tried the suit on, the left sleeve was too short. I mentioned this to the tailor who said, “The sleeve isn’t too short. Your arm is too long! Pull your arm up at the shoulder and you’ll see that the sleeve fits perfectly.”

Well, this guy did come highly recommended, so that’s what I did. But now, the collar was rounded and stuck up in the air!

“The collar is perfect!” he told me. “Just stick your neck out a bit, and then bend your shoulders.”

I did, and the collar laid flat, but my rear was sticking out in the air! “There’s nothing wrong with the back of the suit,” the tailor reassured me. “Just hunch your back, bend back a little and … see! Your rear is perfectly covered! I told you the suit is perfect!”

So I paid for the suit and walked out of the store. A couple of really good looking women walked by me trying not to stare. I still heard one of them say, “That poor guy! He really is crippled isn’t he?”

Her friend looked back at me and said, “Yeah, but did you see that suit? It fits him perfectly!”

I was reminded of this story when a husband and wife came to see me. Both of them are dentists. One of them, the husband, should be; the other one, shouldn’t. I mentioned this at the start of the session.

“What should I be doing?” she asked.

“Cooking,” I said, “it’s your passion isn’t it?”

She admitted she loved cooking but couldn’t see herself doing it. “Why not?” I asked.

“It doesn’t have the status of dentistry,” she told me.

“Would you rather have the ‘status,’ I asked doing “finger quotes” in the air, “or would you rather be happy?”

“How do you know that I’d be happier doing that?” she asked.

“Because there’s a lot of fear coming from your heart,” I told her. “And what we fear the most is what we want the most. Besides, trying telling Gordon Ramsey and Wolfgang Puck that they don’t have ‘status.'”

As the session went on, her husband, and admitted skeptic kept agreeing with what I was saying. He even found the session to be an opportunity to tell his wife he didn’t think she was happy being a dentist, but he didn’t think she should “waste” her education by stopping doing dentistry either.

“What am I supposed to do?” she asked. “Quit working and go to culinary school?”

“You can always go to school and continue working. What you’re not supposed to do is pretend that your life doesn’t hurt.” With that she started crying which told me that what I said hit home.

Our lives are often out of whack because we listen to “experts” tell us what’s right for us rather than figuring it out for ourselves. Look into your heart, the answers you’re looking for are there.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

http://www.anthonyquinata.com

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