Now that I’m becoming an expert on grief, I’m re-dedicating myself ….

I have done more discernments, connecting people on the Other Side with those they left behind, than I can possibly count. Along the way, I’ve told people that they’re more the “experts” on grief, than me. Now, I’m becoming an expert as well.

Since my father’s passing on November 27, 2009, I’ve lost a brother-in-law to suicide (last month), a first cousin was murdered (just a few days ago), and my mother seems to be nearing the end of her life on this plane of existence.

Losing three people I love so close to each other … I’ll admit, it’s all been a bit much for me. Lack of sleep has been an issue, and I feel as though I’ve been run over by a Mac truck.

Just a few days ago, I was talking to my friends, Geri Jewell, and Josie Varga. Geri was talking about how many people she’s lost in the past three months. “It isn’t fair!” she told me.

I told Josie that I wasn’t sure how much longer I wanted to do “Medium” work. She asked me why I was thinking that way, since I’m so “gifted.” To be honest, it was a “business” decision. That sort of work takes a lot out of me, and I was getting many more appointments for Clairvoyant readings, which uses up a lot less of my energy.

Yesterday, I was hurting, I mean hurting. The thought came to me that I know that death doesn’t end life, love or relationships, and I was hurting bad. “How much more are people who can’t do what I do hurt when they lose someone they love?” I asked in prayer.

This is a tremendous gift, and with it comes incredible responsibility. I’m sorry to say this, but I forgot that basic fact.

So now, I’m rededicating myself to this work. I talked to Josie yesterday, and we are making plans to do presentations based on her book, and my ability.

Thank you for your patience with me, your love and support during this time.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

http://www.anthonyquinata.com

“Let go of the guilt!”

I do a lot more readings and discernments than I write about … I’m just not comfortable talking about what was said in private. I’ve decided to write this because I’ve noticed a trend in the discernment sessions (where I reconnect people with loved ones they’ve lost). Whether it’s fact to face, or over the phone, most of those on the Other Side who are bringing their loved ones to me, have taken their own life.

These sessions are, for me, very difficult. The energy of suicide is heavy, as heavy as it gets. Last Saturday I did a discernment for a woman in California, over the phone. The Sunday before I kept getting the urgent feeling that her “daughter” needed to be there too. It was not only a feeling, but a thought, a persistent thought. As usual, I had no clue why, but I found out at the time for the reading.

Nancy (not her real name) and her daughter Stacy (not her real name) were on speaker phone for the session. There was a reluctance on the part of the spirit to come through initially, but then I heard a, “Hi Stacy!”

“Who are you?” I asked.

“I’m her sister.”

“Stacy, I have your sister here.”

That’s how the discernment began. Even though she and her mother disagreed, Jane (not her real name) kept insisting that she was responsible for her own passing. Later, it came out that Jane didn’t die until 18 days after she took a lethal dose of drugs and alcohol. Then I saw a plug being pulled from a socket, my symbol that someone had chosen to “pull the plug.”

Both Stacy and Nancy were dealing with guilt for different reasons. Nancy and Stacy had an argument the day Jane started down the path that led to her eventual passing. Stacy felt she should have left with her … perhaps Jane wouldn’t have done what she did, if she had.

Jane’s messages to them. “I’m okay. I love you. Let go of the guilt!”

I learned recently that my “job” isn’t to make people feel better – it’s just to pass on messages. The “job” of those on the Other Side is to guide people through their grief. Our job is to put one foot in front of the other as we move through our grief, no matter how those we loved crossed over from this life to the next.

I feel your peace,

Anthony

http://www.anthonyquinata.com

Two days to grieve?

My father passed away a week ago in his sleep.  Yesterday, I was having coffee with television producer, Sheri Kaz.  She asked me how I was doing and I told her that I’m doing well, because I believe that grieving can be done in a couple of days.  Any more than that and it’s more about you and your issues than the person’s death.

She disagreed with me.  She told me how much she grieves her grandmother’s passing even though it’s been a few years now.

“What is it you’re grieving?” I asked her.

“Not being able to talk to her the way we used to,” she responded without even thinking about it.

“You just proved my point,” I told her. “You’re over her passing, what you’re grieving is not having the time you spent with her anymore. Really though, anytime you talk to her, she hears you, and guides you. You need to learn to listen.”

I’ve been reconnecting people with their loved ones for a while now and, ultimately, the messages from the Other Side are about moving on. That’s not to say that they don’t care about you anymore.  They do.  Typically even more so now.  Which is why they want you to get on with your life, and not stay stuck in your grief.

I tell people all of the time that they don’t need me to reconnect them to their loved ones, because the truth is the connection is broken due to death.  We just fail to listen.

Tonight, I’m in Los Angeles and I spent time with my sisters, Meridith and Nadine. We talked about all of the ways our father is still reaching out through the veil and making his presence known to us. That’s not to say we don’t miss him. We do, and we will. But as I explained to them when they told me the circumstances leading up to his crossing over, it was simply time for him to go.

My father’s funeral is next Wednesday. I’m sure that’s when it will become more real for me. I’m also hoping that when it does, I’ll be a much better Medium for it. I know my father would want that.

By the way, as we talked over our coffees, Sheri told me that she still talks to her grandmother all of the time. Then as she started answering my questions she realized that she also hears from her grandmother as well.  She also realized she’s been listening all along.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

https://www.anthonyquinata.com

“Be gentle with me….”

I recently wrote about a woman I met who came to see me about a relationship gone bad (see “Lessons Not Learned …). I told her that she had lessons she needed to learn which she insisted she already had.

Well, I got a call last Saturday from her (I didn’t know it was her when she called) asking if she could see me that day. It wasn’t something I normally do, but I did have a cancellation so I had the time open. When I saw her again it still didn’t hit me who she was. When I started her reading I brought up things I talked about to her before, and things I hadn’t.

I need to stress here that I usually don’t remember readings, and I didn’t recognize her from before. But all of a sudden it hit me who she was. The difference was she was open to hearing what she needed to hear, and not just what she wanted to hear.

I love people like her who come to see me. To me, it’s what this work is all about. After all, the word “psychic” comes from the Latin word “psyche” which means, “soul.”  To me, the real purpose of psychic work is helping people at the soul level, and that’s where I get my greatest satisfaction, whether it’s a Clairvoyant session, or a Medium discernment. If I can help people make a shift in their lives at the level of their spirit, it excites me.

Well, I helped her remember what she had forgotten about herself, and the lessons that come from that wisdom. I could feel the transformation of her heart as we spoke. Rather than obsessing about the relationship she just lost, she now looked forward to being in a new, more fulfilling one.

When we set up the appointment she told me, “I need you to be gentle with me because I’m in a very fragile place.” What I helped her to do was to be gentle with herself.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

https://www.anthonyquinata.com

Suicide victim says, “I wasn’t judged, or condemned. Don’t judge or condemn yourself.”

I did a Medium session for a woman and her mother this morning. Last night and this morning a male spirit kept prepping me for the discernment by telling me to ask for the ring one of them would have. It’s not something I normally do, but I did just to make sure I had the right soul connecting to the right people. So I brought up the ring that belonged to the spirit they wanted to hear from. I was surprised when, instead of being given a male ring, I was given a female’s ring.

To add to the confusion I brought up a woman that neither of them knew. All the confusion would be cleared up in due time though.

When I began the discernment a man did come through and take “center stage.” It turns out he was Amanda’s mother’s father. He had messages for his wife and daughter. After he was done and pulled his energy away, I looked for the woman I initially brought and she was nowhere to be found. I asked, and confirmed that the ring I was given was bought at an antique store.

My advice is that if you ever buy an antique, cleanse it’s energy by smudging it. If you don’t know how there are people out there who do and will be happy to do it for you, usually for a reasonable fee. The way to cleanse a ring is to simply put it in a bag or box of sea salt for a week. Doing this will allow you to imbue only your energy on it.

When I began to bring another soul through, it was someone who claimed to be a sister of Amanda. Amanda told me this was correct.

I was then shown “Tiny Tim,” a icon of the 60’s who had a hit song entitled, “Tip Toe Through the Tulips.” Whenever I see Tiny it’s a warning to do just that.

Initially Amanda’s sister didn’t want to communicate with me. Slowly but surely she opened up. I found out that she took her own life. She also told me that she did so on, or around, her father’s birthday. When I mentioned this it was the first and only time Amanda openly wept. Her sister wanted to apologize for ruining her father’s birthday. She was buried on that day.

A number of things were resolved today. Amanda’s sister made it clear they had nothing to feel guilty about. She died from a disease. Not a disease that’s easily recognizable or easy to detect, but a disease nonetheless. She also wanted to make it known that she was not judged nor condemned for what she did.

When it comes to discernments, for me, suicides are so hard to do because the energy is so heavy. One of the first things I’m told by those who have taken their own lives is that they weren’t aware of how much pain it would cause those they leave behind. Now they have eternity to make peace with themselves, and they want you to make peace with yourself.

As the session was ending Amanda’s mother asked me if she would ever see her daughter again.

“Absolutely,” I told her. “You are still her mother, and she’s still your daughter. She took her life away from you, not her love.”

I feel your peace.

Anthony

Lessons not learned, return to haunt us.

A few days ago a young woman came to see me at Cornerstone Books Metaphysical Fair. I told her not to tell me what she wanted to talk about, I would tell her. She agreed.

I quickly zeroed in on what she wanted to talk about,  a relationship that recently ended. I told her I heard verbal abuse and she admitted that it was her who verbally abused him. She wanted to know when he’d be coming back.

“Well, it feels to me as though he’s already moved; he’s already found someone else.”

“Yes, he has,” she told me. “So you’re saying he’s not coming back to me?”

“Not in the way you’re hoping,” I told her. “Why would he?”

“But I’ve learned my lesson!” she almost yelled at me.

“No you haven’t, and the truth is, you really don’t want to. Would you like to know what your future holds for you? You’ll find someone else, just like him. Then you’ll verbally abuse him until he leaves. You’ll repeat this pattern until you figure it out.”

She looked dejected and went on the attack. “You haven’t told me anything.”

“I haven’t told you what you want to hear, but I am telling you what you need to hear.”

With that she paid my fee, and got up and left.

The lesson she felt she learned was that abusing her ex-boyfriend caused him to leave. What she hasn’t learned is why she did it in the first place. I could have told her, but she didn’t want to hear it.

My point is that it’s only when we embrace those parts of ourselves that we fear and even hate that we become free of them. Not until then.

I feel your peace.

Anthony

To the staff of Denver’s Historic Oxford Hotel – I can’t thank you enough!

The past couple of weeks has just been a blast! I was hired to lead “ghost tours” and turned them into “tour/investigations” during which people on the tour could use equipment used during investigations of hauntings. Everyone had fun, but I’m sure I had the most fun! LOL

Best of all, for me, I was given a tour of the attic! I was shown a space in which I had to crouch in order not to hit my head. While we were in there I called out, “Hello!” something I often do during an investigation. Not two seconds later, we both heard what sounded like a heavy boot stomping above our heads. “What’s above us?” I asked.

My host shrugged his shoulders and said, “I don’t really know. The roof I think.”

“Did you hear that?”

“Yeah.”

I called out “hello” again, and again, heard what sounded like stomping from above us in response.

I was shown some of the areas in the attic where the energy was “heaviest.” Could it be some of the relics from the hotel’s past that contains the energy? I really don’t know, but I’d love to do some more investigating to find out!

If you live in Denver, or are visiting, while there aren’t any more tours planned, you really should make plans to spend a night or two here. It’s a beautiful hotel, with great staff, and a spa next door. Be sure to ask for room 320, because it may be the most “active” room in the hotel.

Who knows? You might even see or sense one of the resident ghosts. A number of the people on my tours did!

To the staff of Denver’s historic Oxford Hotel, thank you.

Anthony

“Why would God do that?”

I received an e-mail from one of Natalie’s sisters in which she told me, “I am still having a hard time trying to figure out why the big man upstairs would take a mother and daughter (emphasis mine).“

The truth is God didn’t take them. It was simply their time to leave us and go back home. It helps to think of this life as school. When we learn (hopefully) our lessons we “graduate.”

In real life, do people “graduate” having not learned as much as others in the same school? Absolutely. There are those who learn very little at all. Same thing happens in life.

I’m not suggesting that this was the case with Natalie, and her daughter, Carrie. To me, the lesson we’re supposed to learn while we’re here has to do with love. Love for ourselves, and love for others. I believe that even Mother Teresa had lessons to learn when she “graduated.” I’ve been told that what we don’t learn here, we’ll have to learn on the Other Side; but it’s much more difficult there.

My point is that God doesn’t take our loved ones away. He is not the angel of death. She doesn’t sit around wondering who’s life she can ruin by taking away the life of someone they love. At least, not the God I love.

I feel your peace,

Anthony

I’ll miss you, Natalie

Yesterday I received a phone call to let me know that my friend and colleague, Natalie Smith Blakeslee, died from lung cancer. Natalie was a very gifted Medium and psychic. She founded the Healing Hearts Network, for bereaved parents, after losing her own daughter, Carrie, to leukemia.

Natalie and I became friends a few years ago after she contacted me for a discernment in which she hoped to hear from Carrie, though I didn’t know that at the time. I also didn’t know that she was a Medium until after our session, but it was the basis of what was to become our friendship.

A couple of years ago she honored me by asking me to help her by doing readings with her for her support group, a few days before Christmas.  Together, we passed on messages from children to their parents, and Natalie received a message from Carrie as well. Not that it was the only time she heard from Carrie through me.

Once, I was on the phone with Natalie, and I conferenced in our mutual friend, Josie Varga. It was Natalie’s birthday, so I asked Carrie if there was any message she wanted to pass onto her mother. I kept getting references to “candy corn” and “candy kisses.”

“Natalie,” I said, “this makes absolutely no sense to me, but I hope it does to you. Carrie wants me to say, ‘candy kisses’ to you, and she’s showing me candy corn as well.” Natalie immediately burst into tears. It turns out that candy corn was Natalie’s favorite candy, and the day before, during her birthday party, she passed out candy kisses she received for Valentines Day from her husband, Steve. Natalie was a medium, but she was also a grieving mother.

She was also a great friend. She listened patiently and offered support as I spent on the phone with her talking about my frustration doing this work.

She had a television show called, “Healing Hearts,” and I’m honored to be able to say that I appeared as a guest on her show. Afterwards, we did two group sessions together. She kept saying how impressed she was with me, but I’m sure it wasn’t as much as I was with her and her gift.

Soon after hearing about her passing, I lit a candle for her.

Natalie, I love you and I’ll miss you, my friend. Steve and Allie, I’m here if you need me. I’ll keep all of you in my prayers.

Carrie, I’m happy you were there to meet your mother, and to help her transition over. I’m looking forward to seeing both of you, one day, when my work here is done, and my lessons are learned, as well.

 

I feel your peace.

Anthony

Turning criticism into a blessing.

A young man came to see me a few days ago for a Clairvoyant session. Before we got started I told him that I could tell from his energy that he was a skeptic. He admitted that I was right, but he said he was going to keep an open mind throughout the session. After all, his wife had seen me twice before, once when she was a month pregnant and not showing. She became a believer in me when I mentioned to her that at one point she looked, to me, for about three seconds, as though she were nine months pregnant! When she came to see me again, she was definitely showing as at that time she was eight months pregnant. She told me she was wondering if there was anything to be worried about. I closed my eyes for a moment (she told me this, I don’t remember) and said that there will be a scare but not to worry because everything will be fine. When she started to deliver, the baby’s umbilical cord started to come out first, so the doctors did an emergency c-section. I was elated to meet their beautiful two month old daughter before the session.

During our time together Aaron (not his real name) did a lot of hard work looking at himself. He’s using what he learned to transform his life. I received a message from him thanking me for the session saying he hadn’t felt that close to God in years. This was after he called me an “asshole” a couple of times (yes, really). I laughed both times (yes, really).

Contrast that with his mother in law who flew in from California to see me about 6 months ago. After her session with me, she walked out of my house angry! According to Aaron and his wife, she admits that I was on the money, yet she’s still complaining about what was uncovered about her “false self.” I thought it was funny that she tells people about me to this day saying that I’m impressive, but she didn’t like what I had to say. According to Aaron and his wife all of her friends say to her, “Well, he’s telling you the truth!”

During my Clairvoyant sessions my first task is to see people the way God sees people – perfect. From that point on, I’m the mouthpiece of the Source of all that is, and nothing more. I don’t judge, and I don’t criticize. If people think I am doing that, I tell them to see the criticism as a blessing – that way it doesn’t hurt as much.

My ideal client is someone who comes to me to see why their life isn’t working and how they’re responsible. When they’re done judging me for having the nerve to say what I say to them, they pick out the kernels of truth, and go to work.

Truthfully, you don’t have to pay for my time to get similar information. Just ask people in your life – especially the one’s you don’t like – they’ll be happy to do it for free. And they don’t have to be psychic to know your truth!